THE BUGMUNCH -- Local News

Herbie Husker ruled ineligible for opener
after tests indicate steroid use

LINCOLN -- Veteran University of Nebraska mascot Herbie Husker will not participate in spring drills or the Aug. 30 opener against Oklahoma State after an NCAA-ordered drug test turned up traces of anabolic steroids in his system, Nebraska Athletic Director Steve Pederson confirmed Thursday.

Herbie, 30, had been put on a strict conditioning program Feb. 11 under the watchful eye of Husker Performance Team Member Mike Arthur in hopes of getting the longtime mascot into shape for the Cornhuskers' first game. At the time, Pederson said he wanted a mascot that "fits the Nebraska image of strength and power."

Early last month, trainers said the mascot had lost about 40 pounds of fat and put on about 50 pounds of muscle. But concerns about whether the training regimen was above board surfaced by the end of March, at which point Herbie had added an astonishing 172 pounds of body mass. 

Perhaps more alarmingly, teammates and co-workers noticed the normally happy-go-lucky mascot had become prone to violent outbursts, was beginning to go bald and had developed a severe case of acne. Regardless, athletic department staffers continued to provide in-depth updates on Herbie's training progress on the department's official Web site, Huskers.com.

On an anonymous tip, NCAA investigators accessed the Web page and promptly ordered a drug test. NU athletic department staff received the news Wednesday that Herbie had failed the drug screening. 

The association's bylaws state that the minimum penalty for a positive test for illegal performance enhancers is a one-game suspension -- or one offensive series in a non-conference game if you happen to play for a Florida school.

Pederson said NU would not appeal the NCAA ruling.

"For Christ's sake, what a mess," Pederson told reporters Thursday. "This wasn't supposed to happen. This whole 'getting Herbie into playing shape' hokum was just a dumb little marketing campaign to keep all our pinhead fans -- er, those 1.7 million valued members of the Husker family, that is-- all wound up and excited over the summer. Sigh, we were going to wrap up the campaign by rolling out a new buffed-up mascot in August, and that was going to be the end of it. 

"But somehow, it went wrong. Oh, so terribly, terribly wrong."

Herbie's absence will make an already thin position even thinner for NU on Aug. 30. In addition to carrying the "N" flag as he and the yell squad run out of the south tunnel on game days, Herbie has forged a solid reputation for sauntering along the sidelines while swaying his head from side to side in search of a fight with the opposing mascot. Also, he tends to hold a sign with "WER" written on it, which is used during the "Husker Power" cheer just before kickoff.

Those duties, and the severe pressure that comes with it, now falls to the less-experienced Lil Red, 10, a far slower, less versatile and flexible mascot. Reached for comment Thursday, the understudy indicated he was ready to step up to the challenge.

"Oooh, Me Lil Red," the inflatable mascot said while standing on his head and spinning around in tight, bouncy circles. "Me love kiddies. Oooh, you likey me, too? Wheeee!"

Herbie, meanwhile, was unavailable for comment. Telephone messages to his apartment and to the Lincoln home of his father, Harry, went unanswered Thursday.

However, other members of the Big 12 mascot community described Herbie as confused and angered by the NCAA ruling, mixed with bouts of depression and raging sexual impulses.

"I think that deep down, Herbie is really hurting," said Chip, the mascot for the University of Colorado. "He's been under a lot of pressure lately, what with Pederson basically calling him a weak-assed wussy in front of the whole state back in February. I mean, making fun of a mascot's appearance is like insulting an Arab's mustache; you just don't do it, y'know? Couple that with Lil Red constantly bringing up that stupid Mascot National Championship he won a few years ago at lunch, and yeah, you've got the potential for something like this to happen.

"He was just trying to stay on top of his game, so he could please everyone. He's the only victim here."

In addition to the NCAA-imposed suspension, Herbie could also face internal punishment, Pederson said. However, the athletic director hinted that NU action would not result in any additional missed playing time.

"Herbie is a not-so-young man who knows he has made a mistake," Pederson said. "Our mascots are under a lot of pressure to succeed, and it is clear that in this case we may have pushed a little too hard. At this time we feel that it is in Herbie's best interest to be in a structured environment, and that means to get him back onto the sidelines as soon as possible. We fully expect to have him back in action, needlessly waving his arms and distracting fans from the game, in no time."

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